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| Me on the AT |
I enjoyed the snow, and also seeing our long project list get shorter and shorter. In the end we didn't get quite everything done, but enough to count. The joys of being a satisficer. we took the end of the month to take a trip to the Florida Keys to absorb some warmth and relaxation before hiking.
February I headed out solo to hike the 4 day section of trail that had been intended for January's long weekends, the weekends the snow came. It felt really good to be out on my own, and and very achievable, even though I was carrying more weight than I would have with Jake with me, and too much food. We still laugh about the dried coconut that lasted for a month on trail...
That weather was fine, despite it being early February, a gift. we took a week see my parents, my mom I hadn't seen since 2019, and to finish up every logistical thing we could think of before heading on to trail together. that same weekend, our house rented, perfect timing! but instead of the 12 month lease we hoped for, they wound up signing one for 18. So we are really going to have to figure out our lives as "homeless" well beyond the trail.
From mid February to the end of June, we covered about 1050 miles. skipping 99 in Virginia we might make up in fall. It was wonderful. Everything I wanted from the experience, and not as physically hard as I had worried. I never had back pain (except from a hostel bed!) and though my leg muscles ached at night, the more chronic pain in my ankle and knee and hands improved. I was taking 1-2 aleve most dayst. I did have problems with my petellar tendons and had to work through that, and I did develop some carpal tunnel numbness in one hand, which I could only partially resolve on trail, and still hasn't quite completely gone away.
But in the end, even after fighting through the "Virginia Blues" and making it into the easy part of PA, I lost interest. just when my legs were at their best they had been. I think it was mainly the heat that got to me, and the mindset of needing to go go. I'm not a fast hiker, starting at 1 mph and eventually getting up to 2mph, I was disheartened everytime another thru hiker blew past me. I loved watching other hiker's journey on Instagram, but it was also hard to see my classmates start in April and catch up to me. It was hard to watch people I knew early on get so far ahead. It was also hard to watch people I liked, or felt were more my speed, leave trail.
In the end, I could have my best day on trail and still feel like a failure. I could push hard for 15 miles, which many others do 20 regurlarly and even 30 sometimes, and feel like I had no time in my day to enjoy anything. I had had so much euphoria with burgeoning spring, summer felt like too much.
So we took a break from trail to do more fun car camping, and also went to tropical paradise in Aruba, and I loved it. When we got home we drove our car all the way to Maine to try and continue on up there, hopefully away from heat, but honestly, it was hot even there. and I had 1.5 great days but felt my mind turn off in the same way to all of this. The outdoors are the love of my life. I grew up wild a little like Huck Finn, and as an adult am a naturalist and hike nearly every weekend. So this was a weird and confusing feeling for me, but I had to admit that I had possibly gotten my fill. That I was actually content and ready to do something else. It still feels like failure. and it's still hard to read others comments about their own hikes. "I'm not a quiter" "I'm strong enough to keep going" as personal digs. It's kind of stupid I know. I never even cared about be a certified "thru hiker" as an acolade. But when you get 500 miles in it does sort of get into your mind. So quiting was hard but also right. I hope I get out there and do another 1000, or more. but not this year.
So after all that we still had someone living in our house for another year! what to do with ourselves? We'll find out more about that next week.
